I’m sitting in my room not doing hw like usual. Nothing that special. I found a really interesting monologue in Marlowe’s Dido, Queen of Carthage (how couldn’t I like this play after translating book four of the Aeneid twice!) I’ve got so much to do and so many big plans but the rush is starting to fade. I mean every time I pick up a script or read something about a drama school I get dizzy with all the thoughts spinning in my head. And I’m really happy. So many things are going right… So why do I feel awful? Just looking at all of the ROTC stuff all over my room. I mean I made a commitment and I’m not the kind of person who goes back on their word. But if I don’t do this I’ll regret it for the rest of my life. Some people seem to think I’m making a very sudden, rather rash decision but this feels right, like moving out of my mom’s house. It was the right thing to do but I felt awful at the time because I was abandoning her. And that’s what this feels like—I’m abandoning a promise I made. I went with my gut then and that’s what I’m going to do now. And I’m going to work so hard to prove I didn’t break a promise for nothing. Time to get to work!