No not again! Anything but that!!!!@

So i was banished to the depths of the B-level dungeon again!!! Blah! And I was forced to do another disgusting folio shift!! But that is done and for my reward I was given a cart on the 5th floor and I've already found a lovely book on Egyptian magic in french that I'm going to take home. So it's a happy day! Wahoo!! I don't have to back until Tuesday!!! I'm not sure what I'm doing for the fourth of July. I've got a voice lesson this afternoon though which makes me happy. I liked the songs I was practicing this week which always helps. So now I'm on break. Vale!

Mood:
Hakunama-tastic!!

Music:








(It sucks to be me!)

It is finished!!

Well we finished shifting all of these huge folio books that probably have not been moved since they were put there. They were so dirty and falling apart. I was so glad to wash my hands afterward!!! Anyways it's done. Goodbye B-Level!!!! Hootey Hoo!!! lol. My dad would laugh if he saw me write that! Speaking of my dad I talked to him yesterday. My sister called me to remind me it was Dad's birthday because she knew I had totally forgotten. He's doing good. I talked to Gina too which was nice because I haven't talked to her for ages. She's had to take a medical leave of absence from work because she's got so many tests to take for stuff that probably is the result of her diabetes and working on her feet all her life. I'm worried about her but she seemed cheerful enough on the phone. So anyways, I'm in the thick of HP 3. It's my absolute favorite but I need to hurry if I'm going to finish the other two in 15 days! Wahoo!!! I can't wait! So now I'm just hanging out on my break. It's so weird being in this library so much. I hardly came here during the year except to check out books. I don't know, it's so quiet it makes me sleepy. Yup, so hopefully everyone got their letters today. Then maybe someone will write me back so I can send them even more letters!! lol. I had way to much fun writing everyone. Well I should get back to work! Vale!

Mood:
Glad to be going home soon!!

Music:

B-Lever Blues!

Well today they have us shifting on the B level where we have this weird compact shelving crap and it's really annoying. But they've got us working in pairs so it's not so bad. At least I'm not stuck all alone somewhere shelving which is way worse. It's just mind numbing not being around other people for some reason. I don't know. I miss being able to talk to people!! Last night Melinda, Kim, and I made cinnimon apple pancakes. It was fun and very messy but we're become pancakes queens! We've already mastered blue berries and choclate chips. Next we're going to do banana! Then we went on a bike ride and lost Melinda. We didn't get home till like 10pm. Kinda scary time to be two girls out alone in Chicago but we were ok once we got off the lake shore trail and there were some lights. Well back to work! Vale!

Mood:
laksdfjaei

Music:

Busy Weekend

Yeah so I ended up going down town sat. and sun. lol. Well Sat. I got all this cool stuff for writing letters like a claigraphy pen you have to dip in ink and stuff and some cool colored ink. Well I managed to spill one and a half bottles of it so I had to go back and but more!!! It was so much fun though! I wrote like 8 letters this weekend! Oh and then I proceeded to forget to grab them so I could mail them today. Oh well they'll get out tomorrow! So I'm shifting again today at the Reg. Not much eventful going on here. I'm just jamming to Hairspray and other awesomness. Well gtg back to work! Vale!

Almost time to go!!!

Wahoo!! Only 30 minutes!! TGIF! Vale!

Nothin much to do!

Yeah so they're running out of things for me to do today. I've already done two partial carts and am not pre-shelving in the mini cage. It's just kinda dragging today. I think I'm going to go sing on my break but I just don't feel like it. I don't know the library drains me. I need to get a key board!!! Then I could practice whenever! Blah! Must check out e-bay! Vale!

Almost time to go!

10 minutes!!!!!!!! :)

Shifting again!

So i'm shifting on the 4th floor today! No more folios! Wahoo!!! So me and Rachael went down town last night so I could pick up my replacement shuffle and we stoped at Girondeli's (sp?) and got some ice cream. It was fun. I'm so tired today though. Almost time for lunch. I think I'm going to take the day off from singing and just go and read for an hour instead. So I'm going to meet with Fink this afternoon to talk about musical rights for the show I want to do spring quarter. We'll see what happens. I hope we find funding so we can do it. Anywho must get back to work. Vale!

Funk

I'm in a rut. I don't know last night I was just sitting and was in an all around bad mood. I just want a change. You would think moving to Chicago and going to college would be enough. I think I've just moved too many times! But I didn't have much of this problem in FL. I think it's the summer. Every summer I just get so blah I want to go nuts. I thought it was because I usually spend my summer's alone and the lack of human contact was driving me insane but I don't know. I've got roomates and people at work and friends I can call whenever I want and it's still the same feeling. I don't know summer makes me restless. So Melinda and Kim were trying to come up with random silly things that I could do to break this pattern. But a moment of change isn't going to help. I think it's something deeper that I don't understand. I just hate summer and no matter what I'm doing or who I'm doing it with I just get so darn stir crazy and no amount of stirring will make it go away. I don't know what's wrong with me.

Workin' at the Car Wash!!

I wish! I'm at the library on my break. I'm shifting folios again. It's just oh so much fun. I met yet another Ben today. How many of them are there!!!?? I also hit my hand and my wound I got from the library last week started bleeding again. This place is dangerous! I don't mind the work though. It's pretty boring but my new shuffle should be coming in soon so I'll be able to hear in both ears again!! Well anywho. Voice lesson tonight. I really don't like all these high notes. They make me dizzy. I just can't control them at all. But they're getting there. I'm really liking the whole apartment situation. It's really nice to have people to hang out with and such. Well anyways I have to get back to work. Vale!!

I'm done!!!!

Wahoo!!! Bio. final is over!! Wahoo!!!! And I just finished my first shift at the library! Wahoo!! I saw so many books that I want to read!! It was pretty easy. Library of congress is silly though. So now I'm chilling at the reg because I don't want to go back to BJ where it's hot and there's no air conditioning! lol. Not much else going on. I'm going to go see Jeremy's elementary school play tonight and then there's an informal naked meeting after. I think i'm going to finally tell them all about the show I want to do. I've just been avoiding it because I guess I'm afraid they'll all think it's stupid or it'll be on fink's black list of sucky musicals. I don't even know how I want to be involved!! Do I want to direct, stage manage, dramaturge, audition? I really just have no darn idea. I really just want to watch it lol. It really sucks that the cast is so small so there can't be that many people invovled. Oh I hope they go for it!! Anywho, I'm off I guess. Vale!

12" Alder & Pheonix You scored 75% Elementality, 86% Magic Knowledge, and 78% Goodness!

Your wand is 12" and rather flexible, The alder is associated with weather magic, mental prowess, and resurrection. This wand will be especially useful in spells concerning those issues. The phoenix is symbolic of rebirth, loyalty, and courage in times of adversity. The phoenix feather in your wand will bring those elements to the party. This is a very powerful and potentially dangerous combination but, based upon your magical knowledge score, I am not worried about your ability to use it. Or maybe I should be...

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 68% on Elementality You scored higher than 35% on Magic Knowledge You scored higher than 58% on Goodness

Link: The Right Wand for YOU Test written by BarefootBegonia on OkCupid Free Online Dating

I'm not totally obsessed!!!

Of the Fandom! Congratulations! You scored 10!

You're part of the Harry Potter fandom, and probably love looking into what people discover about the Potter-verse. You read the books and movies, obviously, and probably a few supplementaries. Congrats!

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 63% on pps

Link: The Harry Potter Obsession Test written by theblacklily on Ok Cupid

One down! Two to go!

Ok so I have one french oral done with and two more left!!! Wahoo!!! Then it's over! Yeah german is pretty much over too cuz he cancelled class on for wed. and friday we review for out test on wed. Next week is gonna suck. I need to write my extra credit paper for bio. Maybe I'll get ambitious and do it today!! lol. We'll see. It was a nice weekend. Well i need to read some voltaire before i go into this next oral. Vale!

Je suis fatigué

It's been a long fun day. I woke up and went to work, which was boring as usual, but I made a pretty good dent into my French HP book. Then I went over and did the pre-show for whistle, which was fun. I got to build my brick wall one last time and scream a lot. Then me and Brian tried to marry my computers so that I could transfer my music onto this one. Well let’s just say that that was a huge fiasco but we're getting there. I think I have an idea I just need Brian to set it up again. So Melinda, Kim, Brian, and I all went out to dinner here in Hyde Park. I forget the name of the restaurant but it was really good. I think I might stop by and see about a job for the summer. Then me and Kim ditched B. and M. to go see Star Wars.

It was really sad but weird because you knew what was going to happen. It reminded me of my Greek thought and lit. class. We would be discussing some Greek play and even if we hadn't been assigned to read the whole thing yet the prof. always would spoil the ending during our discussion. To experience the play as an ancient was to know the mythology and the stories already. So to pick up some of the subtle ways the author would play with things our prof. would tell us what was going to happen so we could experience the play like a real Greek or roman. Well it kind of worked but seeing this movie was like really experiencing what that must have felt like. Everyone knows Anakin is going to become darth vedor (sp?) and amidala (sp?) is going to die. The interesting part is seeing how they get there. It was just kinda fun to really see what it must have felt like.

The only thing that really bothered me was Anakin. At the end of the movie when he's been burned and his entire world is falling apart I didn't even feel sorry for him. I mean throughout the movie he's so distant, which didn't bother me. But when he was with amidala I didn't feel his love for her. He just didn't seem to be very human to me. So when his entire world collapses I didn't feel sorry for him because I wasn't very emotionally invested in his character. I felt sorry for amidala and the republic and obi one (sp?? darn star wars names!!!!) but not for Anakin. He just seemed like a monster. I understood why he questioned the Jedi for wanting to kill the chancellor. He wanted to preserve that ideal of what is right. But he himself had violated that same code at the beginning of the movie by killing what's his name. So I felt for him in his struggle to make a choice and find what is right but the whole love and loss thing just didn't strike a chord. Well I should get to sleep. Melinda and I are going to go look at Bikes tomorrow and I have to study for 3 French orals on Monday!!!! Vale!

I don't want to do this design project!!!

Ok so we're doing little red riding in the hood. And so like i have to do this whole set design and I'm just sort of blah. I don't feel like doing any work.... I just want to go to sleep and take a nap... whatever. I don't think i failed my german test which is always good. Well off to work...

Of course i am an egyptian goddess! lol.

Isis Indeed, you are 75% erudite, 70% sensual, 37% martial, and 29% saturnine.

This Egyptian supreme Goddess is certainly the most influential deity on subsequent cultures. She was the ideal figure of womanhood, usually compared with the Greek Goddess Demeter or her Roman version, Ceres. Isis was one element of a Holy Trinity, the remaining two figures being her brother and husband Osiris and their heroic son Horus. She was the Goddess of Magic for her brilliance, as well as the Goddess of Love because of her tenacious devotion. She is often shown with wings, curving to caress coffins and sarcophagi of many a king. In certain papyri she is shown with her falcon wing headdress, covering her ears. One of her sacred symbols is the sistrum, a musical instrument that was believed to ward off evil spirits. Isis' sistrum was carved bearing the image of a cat and was representative of the Moon. Isis was the High Priestess and an omnipotent magician as well as the only being ever to discover the secret name of Ra. She invariably carries the ankh, the symbol for eternal life. Her name is, by the rules of numerology, adding up to the number “2” and she just so happens to be depicted on the tarot card “Key 2 – The High Priestess”.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 58% on erudite You scored higher than 39% on sensual You scored higher than 10% on martial You scored higher than 9% on saturnine

Link: The Mythological Goddess Test written by Nitsuki on Ok Cupid

Storm ~ 70% Water ~ 51% Wind ~ 74% Earth ~ 74% Fire ~

And the storm rushes in But it makes me feel like I'm alive again... Hey, nice. It seems your personality is mostly balanced. You are likely intuitive, ambitious, and deliberate. However, if you ever feel scattered or rushed, try wearing a Clear Quartz. It inspires clarity of thought and memory and thus helps balance out your somewhat shy Throat Chakra, which is associated with the element of wind and represents our desire to learn and communicate.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 47% on water You scored higher than 26% on wind You scored higher than 69% on earth You scored higher than 92% on fire

Link: The Elemental Balance Test written by Nitsuki on Ok Cupid

lkjsd

don't feel like writing any today.

It's 5:30am!!!

Ok so I'm totally insane. I've been up since 4am. Now I'm in the computer room so I can view these powerpoint notes for my bio. midterm today. And I'm gonna fail my french quiz today!!!!! Oh well. Ok, so I need to study. I just got the coolest request to join my sprinkle group. Oh and I have 3 officers now (including myself!!). Oh the name of the group is "sprinkles make all food taste better" incase you don't already know! It's going great. 15 members as of this morning. Well I should go study. Vale!

No more ibook... :(

Well i went and talked to my advisor today and we talked about my schedule and me wanting to graduate after third year. Well the best solution we could come up with for my extra tech. class i need for rotc is to take one over the summer for three weeks. And of course the only summer I'm not doing stuff for rotc is this summer and I just happen to already have the amount of money i need to take the class but only if i don't buy my ibook now. Sadness!!! Oh well. I'll just have to save over the summer. At the museum now. Kinda bored. Vale!

Laundry

Ok, I'm going to do it!! My laundry is so high it's crazy!! I suppose I'll clean my room while I'm at it. I really wish I didn't live on the fourth floor at times like this... Vale!

It begins.

My cheeks are red!

So today in ROTC we were outside cuz it was field day and we were playing softball and ultimate frisbee. And it was chilly out most of the day and of course my cheeks got all sunburned lol. THat's all I ever do. I'll have to get back in the habit of putting sun block on every day like i did in FL. Went to the Naked Theatre meeting today. They're weren't very many people there today. It was cool though. I'm excited about this "fragments" (soon to be re-named) workshop. I hear it's this sun. but i don't know what time. We'll see. I just want to get up and dance!! I really don't feel like doing hw. Maybe I'll clean my room. Who knows! Wahoo!!! Ladeda. Well Vale!

I'm just so sick..(Beware complaining is about to ensue)

sasjkldjlsflkasfljksdfljkdf!!!! I'm just so sick of my room. Of this french essay. Of just whatever. jljaldfjklasl. Not in a good mood right now. I'm just mad at myself for not showing them what I do best. For letting myself freak out. For not being myself. My quirky high energy self. I miss having something that I really love to do. Something I'm passionate about. I've been so busy not doing homework and such that I haven't made time to do stuff for me. Well that stops now. I'm making a schedule and world you better watch out cuz it's going to be packed! Details to come later... Vale!

I'm still here. . .

I'm still at the desk... My mind is blahhhh... They guy who's supposed to do the desk still hasn't come back yet. Maybe he was abducted by aliens. One hour and 20 minutes left. Darn this place sucks out your soul@!! I can't even read HP en francais ici@@!!! Whatever. Vale.

Chillin'

So I'm working this desk this morning at the museum. Got a bagel for breakfast... Not much else to report. Spent all of last night sleeping. I went to bed at like 8. I guess i was making up for lost time or something. So I'm just sitting here. Vale!

Stuck in my head!@!! (It's really not at all depressing when you listen to it lol)

It Sucks To Be Me

KATE MONSTER
Morning, Brian!
BRIAN
Hi, Kate Monster.
KATE MONSTER
How's life?
BRIAN
Disappointing!
KATE MONSTER
What's the matter?
BRIAN
The caterine company laid me off.
KATE MONSTER
Oh, I'm sorry!
BRIAN
Me too! I mean, look at me!
I'm ten years out of college, and I
always thought -
KATE MONSTER
What?
BRIAN
No, it sounds stupid.
KATE MONSTER
Aww, come on!

BRIAN
When I was little
I thought I would be...
KATE MONSTER
What?
BRIAN
A big comedian
on late night TV
But now I'm thirty-two
And as you can see
I'm not
KATE MONSTER
Nope!
BRIAN
Oh Well,
It sucks to be me.
KATE MONSTER
Nooo.
BRIAN
It sucks to be me.
KATE MONSTER
No!
BRIAN
It sucks to be broke
and unemployed
and turning thirty-three.
It sucks to be me.

KATE MONSTER
Oh, you think your life sucks?
BRIAN
I think so.

KATE MONSTER
Your problems aren't so bad!
I'm kinda pretty
And pretty damn smart.
BRIAN
You are.
KATE MONSTER
Thanks!
I like romantic things
Like music and art.
And as you know
I have a gigantic heart
So why don't I have
A boyfriend?
Fuck!
It sucks to be me!
BRIAN
Me too.
KATE MONSTER
It sucks to be me.
BRIAN
It sucks to be me.
It sucks to be Brian...
KATE MONSTER
And Kate...
BRIAN
To not have a job!
KATE MONSTER
To not have a date!
BOTH
It sucks to be me.

BRIAN
Hey, ROd, Nicky, can you
settle something for us?
Do you have a second?
ROD
Ah, certainly.
KATE MONSTER
Whose life sucks more?
Brian's or mine?
NICKY AND ROD
Ours!

ROD
We live together.
NICKY
We're as close
As people can get.
ROD
We've been the best
of buddies...

NICKY
Ever since the
Day we met.

ROD
So he knows lots
Of ways to make me
Really upset.
Oh, every day is
An aggravation.
NICKY
Come on, that's
an exaggeration!
ROD
You leave your
clothes out.
You put your feet
On my chair.

NICKY
Oh yeah?
You do such anal
Things like ironing
Your underwear.
ROD
You make that very
Small apartment
We share a hell.
NICKY
So do you,
That's why I'm in hell too!

ROD
It sucks to be me!
NICKY
No, it sucks to be me!
KATE MONSTER
It sucks to be me!
BRIAN
It sucks to be me!
ALL
Is there anybody here
It doesn't suck to be?
It sucks to be me!

CHRISTMAS EVE
Why you all so happy?
NICKY
Becuase our lives suck!
CHRISTMAS EVE
Your lives suck?
I hearing you correctly? Ha!
I coming to this country
For opportunities.
Tried to work in
Korean deli
But I am Japanese.
But with hard work
I earn two Master's Degrees
In social work!
And now I a therapist!
But I have no clients
And I have an
Unemployed fiance'!
And we have lots
Of bills to pay!
It suck to be me!
It suck to be me!
I say it
Sucka-Sucka-Sucka-Sucka-
Sucka-Sucka-Sucka-Sucka-
Sucka-Sucka-Sucka-Sucka-
Suck!
It suck to be me!

PRINCETON
Excuse me?
BRIAN
Hey there.
PRINCETON
Sorry to bother you, but I'm
looking for a place to live.
CHRISTMAS EVE
Why you looking all
the way out here?
PRINCETON
Well, I started at Avenue A,
but so far everything is out
of my price range. But this
neighborhood looks a lot cheaper!
Oh, and look - a "For Rent" sign!
BRIAN
You need to talk to
the superintendent.
Let me get him.
PRINCETON
Great, thanks!

BRIAN
Yo, Gary!
GARY COLEMAN
I'm comin'! I'm comin'!
PRINCETON
Oh my God!
It's Gary Coleman!
GARY COLEMAN
Yes I am!
I'm Gary Coleman
From TV's
Diff'rent Strokes
I made a lotta money
That got stolen
By my folks!
Now I'm broke and
I'm the butt
Of everyone's jokes,
But I'm here -
The Superintendent!
On Avenue Q -

ALL
It sucks to be you.
KATE MONSTER
You win!
ALL
It sucks to be you.
BRIAN
I feel better now!
GARY COLEMAN
Try having people
stopping you to ask you
"What you talkin' 'bout, Willis?"
It gets old.

ALL
It sucks to be you
On Avenue Q
(Sucks to be me)
On Avenue Q
(Sucks to be you)
On Avenue Q
(Sucks to be us)
But not when
We're together.
We're together
Here on Avenue Q!
We live on Avenue Q!
Our friends do too!
'Til our dreams
Come true,
We live on Avenue Q!
PRINCETON
This is real life!
ALL
We live on Avenue Q!
NICKY
You're gonna love it!
ALL
We live on Avenue Q!
GARY COLEMAN
Here's your keys!
ALL
Welcome to Avenue Q!

Been busy

Well I had a german test today. I've got to work on this procrastination thing lol. I went to this acting workshop which was fun. It was really similar to this Chekhov workshop I went to at state last year. It was a bit more in depth though which was interesting. Oh and then at dinner Rachael had to get this avenue q song stuck in my head that I got stuck in her head at lunch lol. I'll put the lyrics up for you. I love that musical. Well vale!

Journal Entry

I just don’t know exactly what I want anymore. Is it adventure? A home? A dream? To know what it’s like to be close to someone? To have the strength to let people see that I’m vulnerable. It was so much easier chasing after a star. You didn’t have to think. You just had to keep moving forward. But I don’t know anymore. Can I still justify doing something because it will be fun and exciting? Because it makes all of me burn with a curiosity that’s hard to ignore? I feel so lucky to have had so many great teachers and opportunities. But I wasn’t really happy there. I think the disconnected loneliness was the worst. I’ve always had great friends and I have absolutely no right to complain. They kept me sane and moving forward. They helped me to forget the world at home. I know my family loved me and I cared about them so much that I just couldn’t understand why they would treat me like that. But school, drama, Egypt—they were nothing but my way out. My ways to ignore, forget, and avoid that place where no one knew me or wanted to take the time to get to know me. But what do I really want? In my search for an escape I stumbled on things I really love. But pursuing them makes me feel so guilty. I have this need to interact with people, to care about people. I don’t know why. But what is drama but a way of studying and trying to understand people. I love Egypt because I love the people. Somehow I can care about people who don’t exist or died hundreds of years ago. And so I find in myself this guilt when I think of going after my dreams. How are those dreams going to help the people I care about?

Spinning

It's soooooooo nice out today. So I wore my favorite skirt and twirled the whole way to drama class listening to dreamy twirly songs the whole way there. It was fabulous. Saw Rachael at lunch which was fun. Now I'm killing time before work at 4pm. I'm kinda excited cuz Jeremy agreed to help me work on this monologue I want to put together for UT day or something. It's going to be great fun. Lets see oh and I'm going to this acting workshop on Friday which should be fun. I have to pick 3-5 to memorize and I'm not sure what I want to pick. We'll see. Oh and I've got this darn song from company stuck in my head. It's called "getting married today" and the girl talks like 90mph. It's fabulous! I think I might memorize it just for the heck of it lol. Got nothing better to do this quarter. Well I'm gonna take a nap. Vale.

My Wand!

10 1/2 inches, cedar and floo powder, a strange
Gregorovitch combination indeed! You've been
bitten bad by the travel bug, and change is the
name of your game. A true wanderer, you can't
stay long in one place and wish to travel the
world.


Which wand will yours be?
brought to you by Quizilla

Sprinkles

I love sprinkles– The kind on ice cream and the ones that fall from the sky. It's so nice here at UF. Yeah it was pouring this morning and I got soaked. But I miss the rain. I miss thunder and lightning, two things that don't seem to come with Chicago showers. I actually miss being able to go out in the rain when it’s not freezing. I haven't put on a pair of real shoes since I got to FL. I'm enjoying every moment of my sandals while I'm here because I know it'll be cold in Chicago when I get back. :( Anyway, now it's just sprinkling and it's wonderful. I'm actually enjoying the crazy humidity. It's like a blanket that reminds me of home. Vale!

I'm leaving!!!

Wahoo!! Jackie's mom is coming b/w 1-2pm to pick me up. Then I'm off to gainsville to stay with Jackie and Urenna @ UF for the night. Then back to Jackie's house to stay there Friday night. It should be fun. I'm tired of this house. It was so nice to be able to get outside yesterday!!! Yup, well I think i'm gonna read a book. Vale!

It didn't rain today.

Step after step I slowly made my way closer to the sun. Dreaming the steps forward as the wind danced through my hair. No thoughts, just steps. A waking moment of bliss as the world melted beneath my feet. It was nice. Vale.

It continues

I live in a world of dreams. How is it that a dream can be more real than reality? Dreams that I don't understand. A place where the costs are great and I'm scared. I fit in my dreams but there is so much uncertainty. I have a purpose but am I strong enough to carry it out? I'm afraid but I have to do it. I pray that it won't come true even though I know it must. The wheel turns and my journey is soon to begin. Will I be ready when the time comes? Vale.

I'm free!

I am so glad to be done with airports!!! Wahoo!! I got in around 10pm last night. It's funny how little things have changed and yet something’s are scarcely recognizable. The essence has changed. I walk in and it's not my home anymore. But then I reflect on my problem with the word home. I just don't understand it. I don't know what a home is supposed to feel like. Chicago doesn't feel like home, nor Atlanta... But I've never lived anywhere long enough to really miss it. I don't have a room here either. I'm tucked away in this guest room that's silent. I wish I knew what it was like to be part of a family. A family that does things together and cares enough to take an interest in your life. I think I got the closest glimpse of what that might be like here but three years went by too fast. And now I'm on my way on my great adventure which will hopefully lead me to Egypt. In the book I'm reading now one of the characters is a young boy who grew up in the slums of Sydney. He dreamed of Egypt too. He too was enthralled by this fascinating world thousands of miles away. It made me smile. Vale!

Ok, so I'm not perfect. I never wanted/tried to be. I've screwed up a lot since I got here and I've done/said things I'm not at all proud of. I wish I could just say I'm sorry and let that be the end of it. But I'm working at it. Good night.

Ahhh!! it's almost 3pm!!

Ok, so it's almost 3 and I haven't started writing this stupid 8 page paper. i don't even know if my topic is going to work!! Blah! Called the folks today and found a lot of one act books to check out over the break in search of the perfect one for next quarter. Anywho, must get to work cuz i have to be at choir practice in an hour!! Blah!

It's over!

Well my audition is over. I don't think i did that great. I was so nervous that i couldn't focus enough to pay attention to the pitch. So it was probably horrible. Dan just sat there writing notes. My scales were bad too cuz i was trying so hard to listen that i was no where near as strong as i usually am. Whatever. I'm sick of all the drama that is Dan. Rachael, Melinda, and I had tea tonight. Rachael finally told me she doesn't like my tea lol. Oh well. Huge german test tomorrow and I just want to go to sleep! Vale!

Last Show!

Well I'm in here in the BSLC killing time before out last performance. Sadness. It's been fun. But now it's just boring cuz I pretty much know what I'm doing. I like discovering my character, the performance is just gravy. I love my shuffle. It's so nice. Although, half the cast gives me weird looks when they see me mouthing along lol. Oh well. It's fun. Well nothing else to say. Vale!!

long day

I'm tired. Tons of ROTC hw to do. Blah. Good night.

Dress Rehersal

Busy day today. I've got tons to do to get my uniform ready for tomorrow, then i have to come up with a paper topic to propose, memorize my stuff for ROTC, jksadfjk. And tons of other stuff that i'm blocking out. I got my cane last night for the play. It's going to be awesome! Benno liked my old man voice a lot. The timing just isn't quite right yet but me and Elliot worked on it today. Also, my reactions as the old man aren't right yet. Mostly, I just stand there and look stupid. But I have to get the character to believe he's not stupid and still be a stupid old man. Whatever. We'll see what happens. I can believe we go on after two rehersals... It's going to be interesting. Well, gtg do a french oral. Vale!

Hell week begins...

Final week of rehersals. I'm scared. We'll see what happens. I'm really excited about Anyone Can Whistle auditions next week. I love this show! Too bad my audition song can't come from the show lol. There are some great ones. But Rachael and Melinda were helping me narrow down songs last night. It's going to be fun! Anywho, I gtg do french hw. Vale!

Muffet's Leap

This show was soooooo awesome!!

I passed!!!

Push-ups: 18
Sit Ups: 40
1.5 mile run: 13:40!!!!!!

Can you believe it?!! I ended up following this 3rd year girl cuz I knew she was going to pass so I was like "If I just stay with her I will pass!" and I totally did!! Wahoo!! Then I took the AFOQT which was totally silly and I didn't finish a lot of it. oh well. Luckily there's no penalty for guessing so i just put c for a lot of things. And now I'm studying for my calc. final tomorrow that I'm going to fail. Oh well. I'm addicted to I-tunes visualizations!! I've just been sitting here staring... It's soooo cool!! Well I should get to my studying and essay writing. Vale!

Tomorrow's the big day...

Ok, so PFT is tomorrow. I am really hoping for a miracle! Anywho, we'll see. Rehearsals are starting to get somewhere. Just wish we had some more time! Muffet's leap just went past. Can't wait to go see it friday! Kinda tired. Off to iron uniforms! Night! Vale!

dude

So, I think the play is coming along. We worked a lot on timing. I tend to get into slow mode when i'm being the old guy. I'm just trying to think of a way to make to old man and old woman different. I guess it doesn't matter since the old woman has only one line but I'd like them to be different. I'm really worried about my rotc physical. Praying for a miracle. Then I came home and watched gilmore girls. It's been a pleasant evening. Now on to homework. Vale!

This is getting out of hand!

Your Element Is Air

You dislike conflict, and you've been able to rise above the angst of the world. And when things don't go your way, you know they'll blow over quickly. Easygoing, you tend to find joy from the simple things in life. You roll with the punches, and as a result, your life is light and cheerful. You find it easy to adapt to most situations, and you're an open person. With you, what you see is what you get... and people love that!

What's Your Element?

I don't think so!

Your Dominant Intelligence is Linguistic Intelligence

You are excellent with words and language. You explain yourself well. An elegant speaker, you can converse well with anyone on the fly. You are also good at remembering information and convicing someone of your point of view. A master of creative phrasing and unique words, you enjoy expanding your vocabulary. You would make a fantastic poet, journalist, writer, teacher, lawyer, politician, or translator.

What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

bored...

You Are the Enthusiast

7 You are outgoing and playful - always seeing the happy side to life. You're enthusiastic and excitable. You love anything new. Multi-talented, you do many things well... and find success easy. You prefer to keep things light with others. Opening up is hard for you.

What number are you?

I'm gonna fail...

Ok, so i went to run today without music to get ready for my pt test on thurs. for rotc and I did really badly. It's completely mental and that's what pisses me off. On a treadmill that keeps me at a constant speed I can run for 30 minutes or more but on my own without music i can't even do a measly mile and a half. Blah!!! Now I'm going to get a conditional event and might loose my scholarship. I'm gonna go run tomorrow and the next day and pray for a freakin miracle. I really don't know what I'm going to do. I'm thinking about dropping calc. next quarter and just doing 2 bio. topics courses cuz I am really tired of math. I spent like 4 hours on my calc. homework last night and so I didn't get any german done. And i didn't wake up this morning to do it. So i just blew it off and studied for the exam today. My prof. said i could turn it in on wed. for no points off. So it's all good except i failed the exam today. Luckily there's going to be extra credit next week so it should be alright. Just tired. I can't wait to start taking classes in my major. I'm tired of french, german, calc, and greek people!!! But enough of my complaining. Just mad about the german test. Vale!

busy

11:21 woke up so I could get to breakfast before noon rehearsal
11:49 I see my director at breakfast who tells me rehearsal isn't till 1am and I got up and hour early for nothing!
11:50 I go to the upstairs lounge to sing, it was awful, not in the mood today
12:50 I abandon the lounge and go to rehearsal
1:02 I arrive at Cobb for rehearsal which was a mess
3:45 I leave and go run 1.5 miles to get ready for the ROTC physical I am going to fail
4:32 I arrive at Calvert house for choir rehearsal
5:00 Mass begins
6:06 Mass ends and I head back to BJ for dinner
6:52 I finish dinner
6:54 I arrive in my room and turn on my computer cuz I don’t want to do calc. hw
7:06 Start writing in blog.

It’s been a boring day.

I really suck!

jlksadfjklasdfkljfdjkl!!!!! Ok so rehearsal went far from well tonight. I'm just so frustrated. I just can't do an old man voice. So my director thought maybe we should play around with the fact that it's a girl pretending to be an old man. I kinda like this idea. Which just means i have to do the most horrible old man impression I can and totally own it. I'm just trying too hard like I always do. I have so much more fun just letting go and having fun with things. But i take everything so seriously. It's my first real play here and I want it to be good. I just seem to try too hard at a lot of things and it's annoying. Blah!! I keep trying to tell myself hey janice you like doing this so have some fun! I'm just not fun. I'm boring and up tight and a complete square darn it!! Well i'm going to sleep. ROTC was hell today but fun. Well vale!

bored...

So, I'm here in the museum at the desk cuz margret is at a meeting. This museum can be sooo dull sometimes. I'm just tired and i really don't feel like going to belmont after work alone. But at least i've got my shuffle and german hw to keep me company. Finished my paper!!! I don't think it totally sucked!!! Wahoo!!! We'll see when i get it back. Well Vale!

Happy Valentines Day!!

Yeah so I was up late last night not working on my paper lol. Luckily, my professor is sick so it's not due till tomorrow!!! I gave out my Harry Potter Valentines last night to my house. It was fun. Forgot to write on them who they were from though lol! Lets see... Not much else going on. I'm going to Kurt's tonight for valentines day. He's making me tacos!! Wahoo! Well should work on that paper! Vale!

Little walk...

So after I took the calc. quiz this morning I walked to the co-op with my ipod shuffle and litened to into the woods. And then Giants in the Sky came on and I could just see Jason's face as he sang that song. He looked so terribly cute lol. Fun little memories that make you smile. Anywho, i'm waisting time before work. Paper ended up being a disaster. Blah! But I'm going to see the producers tonight!! Wahoo!! Well I think i'm going to go to work. Vale!

I don't want to write this paper!!!

Ok, so I'm supposed to have this paper done by midnight and i'm not even half way done!! Blah!! We'll 24 hour plays was really fun. But then I forgot all the words to my big song! I mean it didn't affect the rest of the performance and most people thought i was supposed to forget the words lol. I was just mad that i practiced that song so long and didn't get to perform it!! Oh well, i'm trying to forget it but that song just keeps playing in my mind! I couldn't get to sleep last night cuz I just kept singing it in my head! So here are the lyrics for anyone who's interested lol.

Midnight, another midnight
Another 24 hours
Nothing new
Another day is dead
Nothing to do

God, My life is such a cliché.

God, My life is such a cliché
I’m so dull, all work and no play
I’m in love, but she can’t see it my way
I must go, cuz I can’t stay!

A time out of time
A place out of place
Just artists and poets
Garters and lace

Where boredom is the only crime
Where the smallest things excite
Take me to another time
No
Take me to another zeit

Just one time, set me free
Wagner show me all that life can be
A brave new world with unending song
If you find me, take me along

A time out of time
A place out of place
But stuck here in Kansas
Life isn’t sublime

Em doesn’t get it
Mom thinks I’m a fool
I think my boss hates me
But she’s such a tool!

Is this it
Day after night
Nothing can change

Oh yeah, you probably should know it's from Deutchland the Musical! It was so much fun. They wrote a really great totally weird show even if I didn't do it justice. So yesterday I had a run through for the Eunuch and my director actually laughed! For once he liked my character! Wahoo!!! I'll probably change it five million more times but I know at least one that works! Oh, and now i have to think of a funny character for a father. So, today i went to the bank down town and then headed to the mac store where i bought an ipod shuffle. It's so cool and sooooo cute!! Finally, gave up on my cd player. And now i'm sitting here not writing my hum. paper cuz i don't know what i'm gonna write about! Blah! It's only the rough draft that's due so it's all cool. Well i should get at it! Vale!

It's Friday!!

It's so nice outside today. 24 hour plays are tomorrow!! Wahoo!! I can't wait. I hope I get put in a fun show! Anywho, not much to talk about. The sun is nice! Well Vale!

You Are 24 Years Old

24 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Oh yeah!!

Wahooo!! I got a 97 on my calc. final!!! Go me, go me, it's my birthday!! I is very happy!! I don't think i did so hot on german though. And then i handed my test in and the professor does that whole reading through your test paper right in front of you thing. And you totally freak out and study every facial expression to see if you absolutely failed!!! So i have to run for 30 min today in gym. I'm so terribly excited! I picked out a good cd though so that should help. Then off to do some surrealism. Speaking of which i should probably go do the reading for it. Vale!!

Ahhhhh!

So i have a whole ton of work to do. Ger. mid-term tomorrow and i really don't want to fail you know. But i got to do french and calc. as well. Blah! Yesterday i ended up skipping the cast party thing and went out to eat with some friends. We went to this bagdad (sp?) type restaurant. It was really pretty and totally empty when we got there. Food was good too lol. But it was really far away. We met some interesting people on the L though. One vietnam vet. and then this african-american gentleman who gave very politically correct compliments lol. Well i suppose i should get on to that hw. Vale!

Friday Night

Friday was a very crazy day. I was up all night the night before studying for calc. and david didn't get home till late so i had to keep at forever not getting any answers till then!! David you're my hero! I totally thought I was going to fail my mid-term 20min before it was over cuz i had 2 out of 5 problems that i still hadn't figured out. And then sparks flew and i saw the fire works and magic happened!! So i think i did alright so long as i didn't make any stupid errors. Anywho, then i went home and took a nap until german. Later, i met Kurt and we went to this open mic poetry thing in this little cafe. It was the funniest/coolest thing i've probably ever done in this city. There was singing, dancing, and lots of poetry!! So of course I had to recite me and jackie's infinity poem and it was awesome! Then i sang "loosing my mind" and it wasn't horrible! Everyone really liked it and i was dumbstruck. I mean i'm always being told by a certain someone that i am constantly complaining about on this blog and currently not talking to that I just suck. Well I don't believe you certain someone! You just haven't heard what i can do. I was amazed that I managed that song without warming up. And once i got up there I wasn't even a little bit afraid anymore. It was nice. It was a very good evening for several reasons. Well Vale!

I was awake today!

I couldn't believe how much of difference it is when you wake up and eat breakfast before class! I was actually taking notes in calc. today! It was amazing! So i went to classes and to gym. Not much to talk about. I saw Rachael perform last night at their study break and it was fantastic!! She rocked and I ended up getting shot! You had to be there! Well gtg do laundry! Vale!

Cont.

Well I ended up spending the evening watching I love the 90s part deux instead of learning my lines. That darn show is addicting lol! Then we watch HP 1 which was randomly on TV. Talked to friends for a while. I'm kinda in a weird place right now but weird good most of the time and I don't want to jinx it by writing about it online! Anywho, I’m still not talking to Daniel. And I don't think he was ever really my friend at all. If he were he would have cared enough about me to apologize by now. And I'm not going to go back to being his play thing he can torture whenever he wants just to make himself feel more powerful. I was watching him tonight and I kind of felt sorry for him. It's like he has a constant need for people to affirm that he is a special genius of a person. I can't tell you how many times he looked at Rachael and others for affirmation of the cleverness, etc. of something he had said or done. It just makes me wonder why? Why would he need constant affirmations when he supposedly has already decided that he is a genius with tons to offer? So it seems to me he must be far more insecure than he lets on. Fearing mediocrity, maybe he tries too hard and ends up turning himself into something else entirely. I wonder if I do this myself. I've never felt the need to prove myself to anyone. I am who am and I don't feel the need to change my behavior to prove to everyone who that is. It should be evident from my behavior what kind of person I am and what I'm good at. But I do act a bit differently around others. I know I do. I like to carry myself in such a way that people treat me with a certain amount of common courtesy. Maybe, because my parents never really respected me as a human being with valid thoughts and ideas, I tend to value this respect more. Well good night. Vale!

I did it again!

Well i went to math class and again i forgot to turn in my stupid homework!! jksajklsdfajklsfda!!! Other than that it's been a pretty boring day. I made up the quiz i missed in french, drew pictures in gtl like usual. Nothing particularly interesting. Killing time before gym. I think i'm going to work on my lines tonight. THe lounges should be empty so it should be good. Well Vale!

Crazy Day!!!

I am sooooooo busy today!! Blah!! I'm not going to have a moment to do anything till 10-11pm tonight!! Class all day, then gym, then german video thingy, then eat, go to rehersal, then meet Kirk and get home eventually i hope!! Good thing all i need to do tonight is iron my uniform!! Boo on ROTC starting again. THursdays were so very nice without it!!! Oh well. GTG to gym! Vale!

Studying...

So i went to math this morning and made sure to actually turn in my hw this time. Good news though there's no hw for next class. Then i went and studied for german until 12:30 when the exam began. I think i did alright. Forgot that brille means glasses and i totally knew that! Blah!!! Let's see... So now i need to do my french lecture hw and then go to gym. I was up way to late last night. I was wathcing anchor man in mathews and then when i came back i got an e-mail about rehersal schedule. Good news! I am now playing another part! So i'm now in two scenes and have one more line! lol. Which means i have to go to tues. and wed. night. I also got an e-mail about rotc and i'm gonna have to go cut my hair tommorow. I'll just have to skip out of tutorial early and go before work. Well, better get to that french! Vale!

P.S.

I have 20 lines!! Wahoo!! And i'm in one whole scene!! La de da!

My script that I made after cutting out all of the latin!! 

Look at all the pretty colored paper! 

It opens! 

Remembering

So I woke up late and missed church so I’m gonna have to go at 5pm. Anyways, I was sitting and talking to friends in Mathews trying not to do hw but eventually I had to leave cuz they had hw they wanted to do as well. I was just checking my e-mail and going through some of the messages I had saved on my hotmail account. And there was one really sweet e-mail I got from a friend the summer before my senior year. It’s nice to know that at least for that moment I had someone that really cared about me and was brave enough to put it into words. One of those special moments you’ll have imprinted on your heart forever. It made me smile. Vale!

Wahoo!!

I don't know why but i got a part in that play that i bombed the audition for. They must be desperate cuz that was probably the most horrible audition i ever did. I was way too big and went a bit too fast. But oh well at least i got into a show!! Wahoo! I'm probably going to miss the read through though cuz they changed the time last night and i have to work! I'm kinda bummed but what can you do? Anywho, I'm sitting in the reg till i have to be at work. La de da! Vale!

Confused

So I totally bombed this audition tonight. If they cast me then they're really crappy directors or really desperate. I don't know; I just went too fast. I've just been rather agitated lately and I couldn't keep it out for some reason. Anyways, whatever. I need to find a monologue for this audition for sat. At least it's on my own terms. My monologue! So I went and took my quiz for math this morning and now I’m doing the hw and messing up on the darn algebra. I miss happy numbers! I spent a lot of time cleaning my room and taking a shower. Did some hum. reading. Pretty uneventful day.

Daniel is still not talking to me. Whatever. Life just isn't fair or nice sometimes. And it looks like I’m not even going to be able to hang out with my friends in Mathews much anymore cuz he’s always there ignoring me. I have been neglecting my coulter friends so it may be a blessing in disguise. Saw Ben at lunch today. I haven't talked to him in ages. He's doing well and we talked for a bit. I just sort of wonder why he didn't want me. I just got tired of initiating everything so I just sort of took the hint and left him alone. Maybe he thinks I’m an annoying overly emotional individual like Daniel does. But I can't help it! I try and stay in control but you can only push me so far. Why do I have to be so sensitive? I didn't ask to be this way. I really don’t want to be an analytical unemotional person though. I like being able to be happy and being able to experience things without thinking.

Long day...

So i actually didn't do hardly any hw last night cuz i didn't feel like it. So i watched this movie called Deeply instead. I think it messed with me i don't know but i ended up going to bed round midnight. Still really upset but i feel a lot better today. So i woke up early and did my hw. Managed to finish german and french in calc. Then i had to run back to my dorm to get the ger. essay prompt i forgot so i could write the essay and then come to find out it wasn't even due today!!! Blah! So i'm here killing time before gym. I brought aida to listen to instead of phantom cuz i get too into phantom and mess up my breathing while i'm running. It's so much more fun to sing along though!! Well more later. Vale!

I'm sooooooooo mad!

I've never been so terribly upset with anyone in my entire life! I've been trying really hard to be friends with daniel because I like hanging out with him and rachael and my other friends in mathews but unfortunely I just don't think it's going to work. I can't stand his constant lack of caring for anyone else's feelings but his own. He's a spoiled selfish little brat who can't look at anything from someone else's perspective. Because he thinks he's some genius that shouldn't have to change for anyone or have to conform to anyone's box they try and put him in. He's constantly trying to be diffent and blah-de-da but he's not smart enough to get along with people. TO have relationships with peolple that go both ways and not just his way! I'm just tired of crying. I'm tired of letting him get to me. I'm tired of being so upset i get no sleep and can't concentrate on my homework! But i can't avoid him cuz he's friends with so many people that i enjoy hanging out with. I just don't know what to do. I know i'm supposed to love my neighbor and that I shouldn't judge people but i can't take the constant pain. It just hurts. That a friend of mine would treat me with less respect than he would afford a stranger or a dog! He went and wrote a bunch of messages to my friends on the facebook under my name that were really mean and really hurtful. I would never say anything disrespectful about one of my friends. And i guess i'm naive enough to believe that people would have the same courtesy for me. But no, spoiled little Daniel can only see how he feels and how he was annoyed that I talked to his friends online but i was nice. I talked about books we had read recently and college admissions essays and things like that. I was just trying to play around and daniel was trying to be mean and spiteful and i just don't understand it. No matter how upset I got i wouldn't do something mean that would hurt someone i cared about no matter how upset i got. I guess what hurt me the most was to know that he did it on purpose to hurt me. What have i ever done but try to be nice to him?! I've tried to not take things he says personally, tried to make allowances for the fact that he's not as perceptive as some to tell how he affects the feelings of his friends. ANd i apoligized to him for getting on his computer without having to be "taught a lesson" because i knew I had upset him earlier that day. Why couldn't he have told me then what he had done? If he had said "hey i was really mad and did something stupid. i wrote some pretty mean messages to some of your friends through your face book. I know there's no amount anything that could justify doing what i did. But i'm sorry." But daniel is never sorry. he doesn't care about anyone but himself and only apologizes when he knows you won't speak to him otherwise. I just don't know what else i can do. I'm trying not to judge and trying to think of how to be nice but i don't want to just start hanging out with him again just because i want to hang with rachael and the others and pretend it never happened. Maybe if this was the only thing he had ever done it would be easier but it's not the only thing. It's the final thing that tipped the scale and made me realize that i don't think this can get better. I just don't know what to do. Well off to gym.

Janice

Me and my puppy! 

Me & my Sister! 

My Dad! 

Jackie & Urenna @ the movies! 

Daniel is annoying and won't turn off the music!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am going to kill him one of these days and I mean it!! Well as expected I didn't get called back for Crucible or Poe. I wasn't expecting or really desiring to get into Poe but I thought maybe the Crucible sinse there were so many younger parts but no, I was forced to audition for the woman part and not the girl part! Oh well. I really want to be in a work shop or something. I just need to be in show. I'm just going to die! I almost started crying in the dining hall at lunch today. I don't know why i miss it so much when i'm obviously suck at it! Whatever. We'll see what happens this Friday. Vale!

Auditions

Well i totally didn't do any hw today cuz i was so worrying about auditions all day. What can i say i'm desperate!! I need to be in a show! So i was practically on the verge of vomiting! Anyways i just got in there and i was fine. In fact is was so much fun! I couldn't believe how much fun that was! I miss theatre so much. I didn't even care at all that there was such a small group of people watching. I just wanted an audience! It was a amazing and now i can't concentrate to study. I think i'm gonna go to sleep and wake up early and do it. I hope i get something! Anything! I just want to be in a show so badly. What on earth am i going to do when i graduate!! Well night! Vale!

Well I'm back!

So school started today. Was running around a lot. I'm excited about auditions tomorrow. I'm trying to remind myself why I love theatre so much. I hate closed auditions. I miss having an audience. I was hanging out in Rachael's room most of the evening. Dan and Rachael, think or rather don't think like an F for five seconds please! Just get it over with already for crying out loud. Everyone can see what you two don't want to! So just get over it already!!! My goodness. Anyways i'm tired. More later! Vale!